Sleep has been eluding me and I am sure it is med related. So either my body is adjusting to the new dose OR it is a bit of hypo-mania sneaking in. I still cannot tell but it “feels” more like hypo-mania because of the “tingling” sensations so common for me as I get closer to mania, and while in a state of mania.
But I must say I have been feeling GOOD! I have been full of jokes and laughing allot. I laughed so hard yesterday I had tears… and that has been rare. I can think of one blog post that has done that to me lately and other than that, no tears while laughing my arse off. Even better is that the “laughs and smiles” are random. They are not forced by watching or reading something… I catch myself with a little smile as I do my walking outside and I have MISSED that. I truly thought it was gone forever so I am happy that it is coming back to me.
Maybe this med dose will do the trick. At this point, I am not trying to get completely med free…just “feel” more. I am tired of feeling nothing… of lacking desire for everything… to do anything.
I must admit I feel like an old person because I bought my first pill splitter. I finally broke down and got one. Knives are not cutting it anymore and with my clumsy self, I would end up chopping a finger off eventually. HAHAHA
One thing I have learned about life is to take everything in stride. Today I am slapping stupid bipolar in the face instead of the other way around. Today is an AMAZING day. ♥
- What Gifts, Mania? (aminddivided.com)