This quote resonates with me so much. Inside my head, I can hear my “true” self screaming YES!! Finally someone totally gets it! I am not completely alone in this world. I’m not as rare as I once thought!!
After my last “break”… which was a culmination of several years ranging from 2008 until about the summer of 2012… I often thought “who the fuck am I??” “Will I ever get “me” back?” “Am ‘I’ lost for good?” Was the ‘me’ I use to be the real one, or was I this one all along?”
I now have the answer to those questions because for the first time in YEARS, I look into that mirror, and with tears, I see who it was I loved, I see myself again… I see the compassion, and love, I see the person that others came to know and love. The shell of me, because of the disorder that ran rampant like a wildfire in my head, that girl who I couldn’t stand looking at… that person is gone. I hope she never returns and I strive each day to move forward in love for myself, and the knowledge that I have from my painful life experiences. The pain is like a fire, a cleansing fire… the slate is clean and life begins again… with my true self… and I fight, continue on, creating new moments, and holding on to the opportunity to fix things that went wrong.
I am healing daily… and want to help those who love me and have been hurt by me… they need healing as well… and I will do all I can to help…
That is love… and I am love.