We walked, hand in hand, in the dark night… with an amazingly black sky above, beautifully lit with an unimaginable amount of stars… and Jupiter, Saturn, and later Venus in magnificent view. To my surprise, the moon was nowhere in sight… perhaps the reason for the intense blackness of the night, and amazing visibility of what seemed to be millions of stars… and in turn, constellations.
This AMAZING man held me… kept me warm… reenacted our private, and intense special moments… and we laughed from the core of our being over something completely out of our control, not intended to be malicious however unsettling for another, and completely non-fixable. So, we made precautions to ensure it didn’t happen again and just accepted the situation.
We joked, we played, we loved one another in a way only we can ~ my hand in his, our thumbs rubbing the inside of each others palms… we kissed. We enjoyed our night vice and began our walk back home… continuing to enjoy our magnetism, our electrical exchange with the simple way in which we hold each others hand… this way different from all other experiences, and a reminder that the way in which we love is inexplicable. I love this AMAZING man in such a way that cannot be compared to anything I have ever felt, and I truly know, I will never love another in this way… and honestly I would never want a love like this again… it is HIS alone. Forever.
This man made me feel secure, holding my hand tight, keeping me close in a protective stature, and continued conversing with me… joking ~ making me laugh, embarking on intellectual conversation~ encouraging me to open up and participate, and openly speaking of our love, desires, and future we envision together ~ making my heart swell and in turn causing me to open up more about my own feelings and visions for “us”. Happily, my communication skills are growing, and for him, I want to improve and not only open my heart to everything “him and us”, but also (for the first time in my life) allow my heart to be unguarded, tear down the protective walls I have always had up. For this AMAZING man, I want my heart unguarded… only for him.
As we embarked on our journey back home, in conversation, we both turned to look at the magnificent stars… and in that split moment, we witnessed a spectacular event: A shooting star streaking across the black expanse of the night sky! We both reacted with excitement, and astonishment that we both witnessed it together, for it wasn’t right before us, but rather to the side and behind us… we just happened to both look in that direction at the same time.
We continued walking in the dark… no headlamps, no flashlight… our eyes to the sky when not on one another.
This AMAZING man grabbed my hands and delicately twirled me to and fro, bringing me in close for a slow dance and sweet kiss. I was in awe with his smooth maneuvering of this girl who doesn’t dance, and found myself highly aroused with this new connection… it felt like another way in which our electricity became brilliant and intoxicating as it flowed from me to him, and then back to me. I could feel him drawing me in… reminding me that he is home to my soul. That this AMAZING man is, and will always be, the mate to my soul.
Astonished, and swimming in love for him… we continued our walk, our talking, our laughing, and we both continued to be mesmerized by the intensity of the plethora of stars overhead. Fucking amazingly, we both witnessed a few more shooting stars! That was the most I have EVER seen in my life of being a nighttime sky gazer. With this AMAZING man, I got to see the universe’s most beautiful “art in action”, and even more spectacular… he saw it too and was in awe himself.
I didn’t think the night could get better… when all of a sudden this AMAZING man became excited for reason’s I didn’t know, and requested that I jump on his back like a piggy back ride. Of course I complied… excited for what he was excited about… and as my short self got on his back and he stood up, I got view of what had excited him so. It was the one thing missing that night… and it was low and hidden, brilliant in its color and size… On his back, stretching to see… I caught sight of the glorious moon. This man, knowing my love for everything in our cosmos, became so excited to show me that which I would not have seen otherwise.
A magnificent night of happiness, laughter, slow dancing, passionate kisses, hand-holding, witnessing many falling stars together, and this AMAZING man surprising me with the moon I may not have otherwise seen…
It amazes me that each day becomes better than the last… it is NOT waning… it is NOT becoming dull or monotonous… but rather, our lives together become better, more passionate, more lively, and my heart just grows and swells with love for this AMAZING man.
~~My only wish, my only hope… that this amazing man is just as enamored with me… that his love for me continues growing exponentially, and that I make him just as fucking happy as he has made me… because happy is not a word I use often, but since he walked into my world… Happy has become ME.
There is so much I want to do for this man, to help heal him, soothe him, support him, help him feel incredibly loved and safe… and I want him to know in his heart, deep in his heart, and ingrained in his psyche~~~~~~~~~ I WILL LOVE HIM INFINITELY,
I WILL NEVER LET HIM GO.